Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Merry Christmas - Justin Bieber Retires

Justin Bieber may not actually know what the word retires means, but I am sure his haters hope he does.

On Christmas Eve the teenage entertainer tweeted that he was retiring. He previously stated this on a radio show and his people later followed up and said he was joking. So maybe this time it will stick.

If this is a marketing ploy to get people to go out and see his movie that premieres - SURPRISE - on Christmas Day, I'm not sure that this was necessarily the best tactic - all of his fans may commit mass suicide and then no one will go see the movie at all. Total fail.

If Justin Bieber did retire today he would have made more money this year alone than I will make in my entire life. He could have done worse, that's for sure.

To the haters - MERRY CHRISTMAS. Celebrate the jolly green and red day with a smile on your face.

To the Beliebers - PUT DOWN THE RAZOR. Santa may have gotten you something that will take your mind off of this catastrophe. I mean, shouldn't you have moved onto One Direction by now anyways? Harry has way nicer hair.


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