Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Miley is not a Disney star anymore - we get it

So...who else is over the whole Miley Cyrus VMA performance? I was over it before it even ended, but yet not a single hour goes by that I don't hear some sort of commentary around her molestation of Robin Thick and never ending twerking. When I went out for dinner tonight and my server starting talking about it I thought - enough!

Miley is not a Disney star anymore - we get it.

At least, I hope we get it. It's not like she hasn't been trying to make this statement for YEARS to the general public: "I am not Hannah Montana" and everyone smiles, nods and says she is going through a phase. Then what? She grows her hair to a normal length, starts wearing cardigans and acting on an CW sitcom? Get it together people.

Does the girl need to go hit the crack pipe with Lamar Odam for you to take the image change seriously?

Don't get me wrong, it's not like I liked it. The We Can't Stop performance looked like something that was created especially for pedophiles with weird teddy bear fantasies. And her assault of Robin Thick's man area while he was wearing a tack-ass Beetlejuice costume was retna burning. (I will never wear a 'We are # 1' foam finger again.)

What I am assuming Miley was trying to do there was to cross the line so much so that there would be no way you would ever look at her as Hannah Montana again. She tried with weed. She tried with the hair cut. She tried with Can't Be Tamed...but nothing seemed to work. Sometimes extreme measures must be taken.

On a night that is known for big stars doing wacky things I don't know why this one stands out so much. Maybe it was because Lady Gaga didn't freak us out as much as she usually does and Katy Perry wasn't bathing in whipped cream. Kanye didn't try to steal a moon man from a winner and no one flew out of the sky and drop kicked the guys from One Direction. So basically...she didn't have that much competition for the show stealer. The only thing that should have been more talked about than Miley was the NSYNC reunion and we know that was a lame disappointment.

In all honestly, the only thing that was outright offensive in her performance was her hair. I GUARANTEE you, if her hair would have been styled differently this would have been a whole other conversation. If Miley was going for 'sexy' instead of 'ugly haired weirdo sticking out her tongue a lot' I don't think we would even be having this discussion.

And of course, if everything I have said here is incorrect and Miley was not trying to go over the top to make a statement about not being a tween idol anymore - watch out Amanda Bynes, you're 15 minutes are about to abruptly end.

XOXO
Jes...

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