Tuesday, July 23, 2013

He's a Boy, he's small...and he's presented by Kate and William in blue

The Royal Baby has finally made his way out of Kate's vag! Well...he made his way out on July 22 as the world impatiently waited to find out if the next in line for the throne was going to be a prince or a princess.

I was going to hold off writing about it at all until they named the little dude, but I just can't. So this Royal Babe is going to be allotted two posts before he gets full rebel training from his ginger uncle.

The world was put on baby watch early in the morning when Kate and Will went to the hospital. They said it was a normal labour...which I then had to research because I have a very gigantic knowledge gap when it comes to anything to do with children. A normal labour can be anywhere from 12-24 hours. Which is annoying, because I had other things to do that day. So much stress.

FINALLY it popped out and it was announced that the baby was a BOY and the world was like, "Ahhhhhhhh finally a King!" And I was like, "Oh GOD let him have his mothers hair genes."

Then we went a long with our day knowing that Grandpa Charles needed to meet the little blob and Kate probably needed to rest.

Today the world waited again to see if Kate and Will would make the stroll out to the press like Diana and Charles did after she gave birth. And they did, of course, because they do EVERYTHING right.

They even had on matching (but not 'matchy') blue clothes in case anyone hadn't heard that it was a boy. I am tres curious as to what the pink outfits would have looked like had she produced a spawn with a vajay instead.

Kate is f-cking flawless, as usual. Even with her post-baby belly, which is completely normal...don't let the 'post-baby bodies' of anorexic super models dictate what that belly is actually supposed to look like. (Had to research this as well.)

William put the HRH the Royal Baby in the back of the Range Rover and it was driving time for the family.

So now the only thing left is the name...which is stressing me out more than the gender. Right now if you were to go somewhere to bet on a name the odds are in your favour if you go with George or James.

If they name it George I will figuratively die. Nothing good will come of that. Plus, there has also been too many royal Georges. I can get behind James. I would also approve of Alexander. Had Twilight not com into existence I would have been OK with Edward as well.

Well that's it for the Royal Baby Watch coverage...until the name. I'm sure that will be a whole other novel.


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