Monday, April 8, 2013

Brad Paisley and LL Cool J do damage on the ears while offending many with Accidental Racist (LISTEN)

Brad Paisley and LL Cool J team up and tackle people's perceptions of Southern white dudes. I really wish the outcome was - well, pretty much anything but this.

What a train wreck...the kind that, after it derails, dumps some harsh poison on a small town and kills everyone who inhabits it. Yes, it's that terrible.

The lyrics are tacky and some may even say offensive (the song even starts out with an African American guy working at Starbucks and Paisley is the customer...could they not have met in a situation where he wasn't serving him coffee??):

"To the man that waited on me at the Starbucks down on Main, I hope you understand..."
"I’m just a white man comin’ to you from the Southland"
"If you don’t judge my do-rag, I won’t judge your red flag."
"Dear Mr. White Man, I wish you understood what the world is really like when you're living in the hood."

(Find out more after the jump!) 

The music is dull, choppy and the least fluid piece I think I have ever heard from the Paisley camp.

They put in a sampling of Dixie which Paisley does in Southern Comfort Zone, another song on this album. However, it is confusing in this one because he states at the beginning that the Confederate flag on his shirt means that he is a fan of Lynard Skynard and has nothing to do with Confederacy...and then plays the de facto anthem of the Confederacy two minutes later. Huh?

And of course we must touch on the rap collaboration end of this thing. Was LL the only 'rapper' that they could get to agree to speak on this track? Cause his whole part is a brutal laughable mess. This is probably the worst hip-hop and country collaboration we have ever heard (and, God willing, ever will). It is so horrible you think it's a joke, I mean, the song is called Accidental Racist so you think right away that it is one of Paisley's weird jokes, but no. 

The song is just bad.

At first it's not 'burst out laughing because you are so uncomfortable from the sheer magnitude of awful' bad...and then LL starts to 'rap' and you will laugh so hard you will cry. Straight. Up. Tears.

Everything I have read about the song is about the lyrics and whether people are majorly offended or if they understand what the two were trying to do with this thing. Paisley told Entertainment Weekly,

“This isn’t a stunt. This isn’t something that I just came up with just to be sort of shocking or anything like that...I’m doing it because it just feels more relevant than it even did a few years ago. I think that we’re going through an adolescence in America when it comes to race.

...I just think art has a responsibility to lead the way, and I don’t know the answers, but I feel like asking the question is the first step, and we’re asking the question in a big way. How do I show my Southern pride? What is offensive to you? And he kind of replies, and his summation is really that whole let’s bygones be bygones and ‘If you don’t judge my do rag, I won’t judge your red flag.’ We don’t solve anything, but it’s two guys that believe in who they are and where they’re from very honestly having a conversation and trying to reconcile.

...This is a very sensitive subject, and we’re trying to have the discussion in a way that it can help.”

To be completely honest - my knowledge of Southern race issues comes from movies, which may or may not be factual. I can never trust Hollywood to give it to me straight. So, as ridiculous as the lyrics may be to the song - they are not even a factor in my final verdict of this hawt mess.

I mean, it is the worst thing I have heard since Rebecca Black. I am actually in awe of how bad it actually is. It truly is a remarkable atrocity. I have heard a sound bite of a three year old singing a made up version of Twinkle Twinkle that sounds better than this.

If I was going to write a song that was going to get a lot of attention and I wanted to start a conversation around an issue I would at least make it listenable.


Side note: Racism, stop it.

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