Wednesday, February 6, 2013

The Bachelor touches down in Banff, Alberta for some hypothermia drama and some mountain views

The Bachelor aired its Canadian filmed episode tonight - and I just can't help myself. I must talk about it.

The group leaves Montana and goes to Banff and Lake Louise. Let's keep in mind that this is filmed near the middle of October so it is going to be cold. That is right around the time that the province starts dropping in temp and the snow starts to fall.

So what did the show have planned for the girls? They were staying at the Fairmont in Lake Louise, which is beautiful...and since Sean is Mr. Outdoors you know that they are going to be exploring the Rockies.


First one-on-one date went to Catherine. They go up a mountain during a white out and play in the snow. It looks awful...its like he is testing the girls to see how many horrible things that he can get them to do before they quit the show on their own accord. After their snow romp he takes her on a horse drawn carriage ride and then to an ice castle (which he claimed was built 'just for them' - yeah, no). Anyways, he loves Catherine and gives her a rose.

Then the group date is composed of: Sarah, the one armed girl; Lesley, the 25 yr old 'Political Consultant' aka Washington coffee runner; Selma, the girl who can't kiss anyone on TV due to her families strict conservative beliefs, but has implants as big as Pam Anderson's; AshLee, the orphan; Daniella, the girl who we know nothing about and never gets to talk to Sean; and Tierra, the attention whore who cries whenever Sean is in ear shot and is a scary pathological liar...aka the spawn of Satan.

The girls canoe across Lake Louise and when they get to the other side Sean drops a bombshell on them - they are going to do a Polar Bear Plunge...or, as most people would refer to it as, a polar bear swim. FUN. Keep in mind Lake Louise is a glacier fed lake so it is cold, but it is the middle of October so it's not like it is a true polar bear swim because most of them happen in January, when it is actually cold.

Selma opts out of the experience - sorry Sean, she's not willing to undergo physical pain to gain your affection. All the other girls get into their bathing suits and take the plunge with Sean. They are in the water all of 5 seconds before they get out and are covered with towels and heating blankets...oh well except for Tierra who basically fights off the medics who are having to attack her with the heating blankets as she uses this incident to draw every ounce of attention to herself like she is about to die.

CALM DOWN. You know what is really irritating? People who continuously end up in the back of an ambulance because they have no pain tolerance. I hope you get the bill for every time a paramedic was called to this show you lying betch.

I felt horrible for the medics that they had there because it made them look unprofessional. If there was even a chance of anyone needing an ambulance on scene, there would have been one there. There is no way she was even close to a hypothermia episode. No way.

Tierra is then up in her hotel room getting oxygen and acting like she is near death and is told she can miss the rest of the group date. Um....like that was going to happen. She gets ready and shows up late and Sean takes her aside to be like "Glad you're alive" or whatever. He holds her hands and is like "Your hands are so warm" and she is like "I know! It's so weird cause the rest of me is freezing" ...I think what she actually meant was, the rest of me is sweating from the mass amounts of clothes I have had to wear since lying about getting hypothermia.

At the end of the group date Lesley gets the rose and we all think Tierra was going to cut someone in the jugular because she didn't get another pity rose. It was actually quite unnerving. While on the group date Sarah shows Sean pictures of her family and tells him she is excited for him to meet them. He decides the free ride because of the arm is over and sends her home before the rose ceremony. Too bad, I was actually starting to like her.

The next one-on-one went to Desiree. He takes her rock climbing. He is still on a mission to kill every single one of these girls before the show is over. They don't die and he gives her a rose while hanging out in, what looks like, a tepee...I was getting a drink when they entered it so I can't confirm.

Next up is the rose ceremony. Two girls are going home tonight. Lesley, Catherine and Desiree all have roses. AshLee and Lindsay get theirs and it is down to Selma and Tierra...and that Daniella girl, but it was pretty much a given that she was going home. Does he go for the spawn of Satan or the girl who didn't amuse him by freezing her ass off in a lake? He went for the spawn.

At the end of the episode Sean informs them of the weather change, they are leaving Canada and going to St. Croix next in the Virgin Islands...I really hope the temperature/altitude change gives Tierra a brain hemorrhage...or at least a massive nose bleed. Gawd, she is terrible.

And that was all for The Bachelor in Canada.

XOXO
Jes...

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